Dear Mr President (it's all the same)

This is the finished work for Dear Mr President (its all the same), for both the video and the song.

I don’t even remember how I stumbled across the George Floyd video. I know it was on Facebook.

Here are some disclaimers. Some that I’m uncomfortable with.

1. I’m a caucasian male

2. I grew up without much diversity

3. I grew up with subtle racism

4. I remember asking my parents if it was ok if I could be friend with a black boy in 6th grade. I don’t even know why I felt like I had to ask. I was told it was fine and encouraged. But something about the mere fact that I felt like I needed to ask has always bothered me

5. I am 100% privileged in a great many ways

6. I struggle talking about race because I fear upsetting people and never know the right things to say and don’t want to say the wrong things.

7. I cherish the times I’ve been able to talk to my friends about race because it’s brought us so much closer

I think that is most of the disclaimers. So lets dive in from there.

I follow all the big race cases. I get upset. I feel like there is nothing I can do. The system is too big for me to change, and I get tired of arguing with folks who say things like

• He shouldn’t have ran

• he should have complied

• he should have moved slower when going for his wallet

• she should have just gotten out of the car without getting an attitude

It wears me out. And I know that arguing with people won’t change their mind. There is this thing that happens, when you present an opposite view to someone as correct, and label their view false, it causes them to dig their feet in and hold even tighter to their opinion. So at some point in time I gave up. I got tired of all the fighting on social media. So I just stick to a lane. You could label it silence probably. But I’m just trying to get by, and I don’t know how to fix my broken world, let alone the entire worlds broken world.

Anyway. Off topic.

I follow the cases. I read books. A really amazing one I read last year was Talking to Strangers by Malcolm Gladwell. If I could have a man date, it would be with him a heart beat. I love the guy. He details out the Sandra Bland case, and policing and all sorts of things.

But that’s all. And I case hop. From “oh that’s really bad” back to my life that I don’t have to deal with it, to “Oh that’s horrible”, and then back to my life that I don’t have to deal with it.

These are things I don’t have to del with. I’m shocked, outraged, and confused. And I don’t even have to deal with this stuff on a daily basis. I can’t even imagine what it would be like to have to. And yes, there is privilege to that. It doesn’t mean I’ve had an easy life. But it does mean I’ve been spared in having to deal with that.

I’m pretty sure I saw George Floyd die. I don’t know when it is they “ruled” him dead. But it looked like his life went out from him on the video. I don’t know that I’ve ever seen someone die before. And I do know that I’ve never seen someone die like that. I’m an empathic person. I feel things. I have this horrible imagination that puts me in places and times and conjure up images and emotions that often give me panic attacks and anxiety. I’ve been living like this for years. It sucks.

I imagined what it was like to feel helpless, having pissed myself, somemon’s kneed to my neck. Unable to breathe. If you’ve ever had an asthma attack or a panic attack, I know you feel me.

Anyway. I wanted to do what I could, which is not much. And music helps me process things. It keeps me busy. It lets me say something.

I went to the library of congress and found an interview with a black American soldier from 1942. As I listened to it, I realized, these are the same things being said today still. It was a man who was talking to the president at the time, fuck if I know who it was, i’ve never been good with history, but he was trying to give a message to the president.

• We want to be treated fair

• We don’t want to be called animals

• We want to be seen

• We have value, please see it

• I’m living in pain because you are denying my value

So… the song came together around the idea of, things are still the same.

And here it is